Guiding Myself.

My dear self,
First of all you should know that I love you a lot. There would be no time on earth I would stop doing so. My life’s been quite overwhelming in the period when I was supposed to be going to college and enjoying adulthood. None-the-less I don’t regret any of it now, infact I feel grateful because that period shaped me into who I really am. These are few things I want you to remember..
1. First love yourself. Be generous and kind to yourself. Don’t let anyone define who you are. Create yourself wisely.
2. Never ever give up on Family. Family is a life long possession. Stay together in thick and thin.
3. No one can ever replace parents. Start valuing them right at this moment.
4. Recognize the value of people. People are good. Always put them before material things. Spend time with them.
5. When in pain, remember nothing is permanent.
6. Learn to forgive people and move ahead of a situation that you can’t control but don’t forget what they teach you.
7. Smile more often, crack joke every now and then. Don’t stress. Life is meant to be easy not hard.
8. Try to help everyone you come across in your life, in some way or the other.
9. There will be moments in life where you will be all alone wanting desperately for someone to console you. Remember you are your best friend.
10. Read a lot of books, talk with variety of people, learn an art, dance and sing, travel, create good memories. In the end memories matter not money.

Be your awesome self and last but not the least make sure that before you depart from this world there are atleast 5 people Smiling just because of you.

Love you forever.

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Berhampur Raahgiri Day

An Introduction : Raahgiri day – the day where the whole city comes together to showcase its talent and unique aspects. Raahgiri day was first organized in Gurgaon in the year 2013. Every Sunday a part of the road is closed for vehicles and throughout the road people showcase unique talents, stage shows, street arts etc. Here is the wiki link : https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Raahgiri_day

Berhampur Raahgiri : Berhampur – The Silk city of Odisha celebrated its first Raahgiri day on 10th April,2016. Very few people were aware of the ongoing event but as the weeks proceeded many people gathered from around the city to witness Berhampur as never before. The event is organized from the junction near the Baptist Church, Giri Road and stretches through the road connecting Sashi Bhusan Rath Government Women’s college, Khallikote Autonomous College and continues on Town Hall Road till the PVN Rao petrol pump. The Silk city – Berhampur whirls up with smiles and laughter throughout this stretch of road as different events are organized.

As we start from near the church, we see people doing yoga, then as we move forward we see a group of students skating, then we have the sand art, street show, rangoli, and a stage to display Berhampur’s dancing and singing talent. We also have a camp for BP and sugar level checkup, which is a very wise movement as many people neglect their check-ups. As we move ahead we have the boxing group of Berhampur, then an artist painting his message, and many more. I am sharing the photos I have captured to give you a glimpse of Berhampur when people unite 🙂

Photos from second Raahgiri Day (17th April,2016)

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Photos from fourth Raahgiri Day ( 1st may,2016)

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Being a Berhampurian living for over a year in another city, I missed my city but Raahgiri Day made my visit special, my moments with my family and friends memorable. I stay in a joint family and coming from a family which has many kids of age group 5-12, I witnessed the enthusiasm in the kids face, their eagerness to show their talent in front of people to get appreciated. My smaller Cousin is 8years old. Seeing so many people doing something or the other she decided to show her hula hooping talent and so she did. People enjoyed it and she was happy with people’s response. She has got her admirers and now she awaits every Sunday to visit Raahgiri and also she plans to dance when she gets a chance 🙂

This is her:

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Stay connected through Raahgiri Day and join in the celebration with hundred other Berhampurians.
Special mention to Berhampur Police and Municipality who do a great work in controlling the vehicles and providing with other facilities.
Thank you.

 

An evening at Tampara Lake

It’s been few days now since my visit to my hometown, Berhampur ( The silk city of Odisha, India. Here’s the wiki link :https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Berhampur) . One afternoon after lunch uncle said,” Let’s go somewhere.”
To which I replied,” Umm, why all of a sudden you wanna go.” Later after a 15min discussion and then deciding our destination, I collected two reasons behind the sudden plan.

1. Few days ago I was upset with my Aunt for not taking me along to Bhairavi temple( this one : https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Siddha_Bhairavi ). So this was her way of making it up to me. 😀
2. Uncle started learning to drive the car recently and he is as excited to drive as the little kid next door who never stops pedaling his cycle around.

So we started at around 16:30,which was supposed to be 15:30. There were four ladies and two kids, you can see the reason behind the lag. Oh! don’t blame me, I changed my orange netted top only because mom thought white one will look good.
It was a Tata Indigo Car, a five-seater one (including driver seat). And kids didn’t agree to stay behind, also it would be no fun without the real posers now, would it? So I had to take one on my lap. This girl is my cousin. I didn’t exactly let her sit on my lap, I just gave her a little space (very little I say). Now again don’t blame me for being of more than average build :-p So we adjusted ourselves and started our journey. After a bleary ride of almost 50 min under the late afternoon sun and after taking two wrong turns, we finally reached our spot. Tampara Lake, one of the largest lake in South Odisha near Chatrapur along the National Highway. Before taking the turn off the highway, we got down at a local shop as the smallest cousin was already hungry and she wanted chips. So while they were gone for the chips, me and the other cousin started our photoshoot.
This is me:

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(Me – never satisfied with my click *sigh*)

This is us with the chips :p

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We took the turn off the highway as instructed by the signboard and then the small distance from the highway to the lake was covered with bald trees, dusty road and the broken concrete road is as good as not being there but none the less it gave a feeling of going into the wild. As we reached, the wind was quite welcoming.  We quickly finished our chips and went in. We walked on the bridge which took us little ahead into the water and then the sudden slope descended on to the floating floor. The slope was scary but it was worth it. We descended, and the floating floor was making us dance. The surrounding was breathtaking lined with different trees and plantations. I asked myself “How mesmerizing can the universe get?” I captured these and they say it all.

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some more clicks with my people :

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The floating floor:

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The man behind the wheels and the lady behind the apology trip 😀

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After spending quality time letting the surrounding sink in! We set off to return.There were facilities for boat rides and water scooter too but we didn’t have enough time to explore it all as uncle wanted to leave before dark.
Then waiting for us was the sunset! I just fell in love with the day even more. Everytime I see a sunset, I literally draw it in my mind trying to capture the beautiful sun changing its color from bright yellow, to a little red in its boundary then adding a tinge of orange,  and then it turning into this fiery red ball. I wished to paint it with a brush and capture it but though I didn’t still I captured this :

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After capturing the sunset we stopped at a tea stall and had this little cup of refreshment :

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On our way back we visited Sai Baba Temple in Mandiapalli. The temple is quite famous and is located in a serene area. I couldn’t click any photo there, since it was already 18:30 and my phone camera is no good without enough light. It was Arti time ( Evening pooja), so we stayed for the Arti. It was just blissful! I am neither an atheist nor a theist, I hang in between, saying so I can bet there’s nothing like sitting peacefully in a Temple which isn’t crowded. The vibes are just what you need!

And in the end while coming back we found this fellow lurking on the railing near the temple shoe-stand:

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In all it was a day worth remembering and penning it down has helped me create an even more lasting memory.

(Note : All photos are taken with my Xiaomi Redmi Note phone)

 

Someday…

Someday I will see you.
I know you are out there because the day when I thought I am complete and I do not need someone to take me into their arms, I tried fixing myself but I couldn’t till now.
Someday when you will be here. We will sit together through the night. I will tell you how lonely this day made me feel and how strong I acted.
Someday while eating together you will see how normal and clumsy I am. I will narrate to you about the one particular day which I spent noticing how I am alive only because I am breathing, and then I will tell you of the times I tried to stop breathing.
Someday while walking under the noon sun along the shady road, I will describe to you the ways in which I cried and the amount of tears I had to shed in silence to drain out my emotions.
Someday while lying down together on the grass, I will explain you how I changed from the girl who loved dressing like a bride to the girl who no more bothers to look into the mirror.
Someday I will show you how I stayed alive in this skin, laughing and smiling so that I can be that one person for people to lean on, for I knew how it feels when no one understands the depth of our wounds.
Someday when I see you, I will spill out all the hurt buried in my chest and make sure you spill out yours. We can be friends, or be lovers or just be the missing person in our lives.
Someday when I see you, we will be all OKAY.

My Friend ‘MOON’

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That night when my best friend did not want to talk with me, I looked at the night sky and found solace in the only moon..

That night when my loved one said those hurtful words, I looked up with watery eyes and again found the moon watching over me..

That night when I thought I will die and won’t wake up ever again in this body, I saw the moon peeping through the window at me..

That night when I got to know that the person who treated me like a princess breathes no more, I looked at the dark sky with blank eyes and there again I found the moon shining over me…

That night when I slept soaking my pillow with tears and went to sleep hoping to open eyes to a world less cruel and more loving, I watched the moon accompany me till I fell asleep..

And now when I point at the night sky and say “There!That’s my best friend, he has seen me at my worst.”,they laugh calling me silly and I once again look at the sky and smile at my Friend.

Harmony

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The way people blend in with Nature at times makes us realize that we humans, after all are a part of nature. The wondrous and amazingly breathtaking creation of nature can only be saved and relished when humans start living harmoniously with it. Harmony for me is being one with Nature.

 

 

Harmony

What do you feel ?

Today I was just pondering over my confused thoughts and feelings, playing over and over again the same thoughts, not reaching a conclusion. So not getting a closure, I reverted back in time to my childhood. Back then I just knew two words, I just had two ways of expressing everything. I was either happy or sad. Everything was simple.

‘I am happy, I laugh. I am sad, I cry’

But as I grew up I saw people ascribing happiness as good and sadness as bad. I started perceiving life through others view and stopped seeing the world ‘As it is’ and instead started seeing world as ‘As it should be’. The people I was surrounded with made it clear to me that dark skin is a bad thing, that being tall is a good thing, that being an artist is a bad thing ‘coz one can’t earn enough money with it and ‘money’ my friend, is a good thing! Subsequently, I stopped going after what I felt happiness in and always went with what was considered good. Next I came across other terms like love, hatred, nervousness, anxiety, anger, frustration, lonely, good looking, bad looking, sexy and on and on. My two basic clear feelings of either happiness or sadness were clouded. Now I experience something and I search for the perfect word among the defined words to elucidate it to someone, to let them know what I am feeling. Sometimes I feel lost amidst the web of words and I just want to say ‘I feel sad’.

Isn’t it simple. Either we feel happy or we feel sad, and we should go with something which makes us happy. When we go after what is good, we are in actuality going after someone elses definition of happiness. So let’s do stuff which makes us happy, let’s not shy away to cry when we feel like it ‘coz being sad is a part of life. Once we start doing what makes us happy, we will be driven towards it and we don’t have to consciously choose to be happy. Let’s stop naming and defining everything we feel for someone else to acknowledge it ‘coz tis not about what others feel, tis about what we feel.

 

The unsaid apology.

You meet new people, you get excited, you become friends, you laugh together, you share secrets, you reveal them your vulnerable side, you cry in front of them, you dream of spending time together, you dream of happiness…..

Then all of it recedes, you miss them, you wish you could go back, you don’t know how to start a conversation, you don’t apologize, you aren’t ready to accept an unsaid apology, you aren’t sure anymore, you try to breathe in the truth, you try different things to move on, in the process you meet new people, you get excited and you make friends without realizing that you are now again at the beginning of this note!